As I was running down the ramp to attempt to barely make a train at Grand Central, another woman was running beside me. The doors of the train closed before we reached them, and we both just stopped, disappointed. Suddenly the doors popped back open and we both went “OH!!” and started running again to hop on the train together. We both laughed to acknowledge that we had just experienced that together, and I said to her, “I am so glad we got to share that moment!”
I will likely never see her again, but I felt connected to this person I know nothing about because we shared a dilemma, and succeeded together.
I want you to think back to your first year at college. Think about the friends that you made. Did any of them stick? If you met them today, would they still become your best friend? For me, the answer might be, at least for some of them, no, we wouldn’t be ride-or-die friends if we met today.
I don’t mean that they are bad or undesirable friends. But when I think about the people I really open up to and get close with, some people that stuck since my first day of orientation aren’t like the rest of my friends. They were a special case, a “meant to be in each other’s lives” type of friend. And I think this is because as first year students, we were all scared, vulnerable, and very desperate for familiar faces. This gave us a chance to connect with someone we never would normally connect with. I am grateful for those relationships.
Leaders on campus need to know the psychology of the new students, and that psychology is one open to brand-new possibilities – anything to feel like they belong. What can you do with this information?
- Remember that finding similarities in students goes far beyond style, background, and interests. Just sharing the same emotions on move-in day might do it.
- Encourage new students to join clubs they’d never have thought of. The possibilities are endless during this beginning.
- All new students, no matter your perception of them, are nervous. He may seem like he’s “too cool for school” and she may seem “bored out of her mind,” but they are all thinking about what their new life is going to be now that college has begun.
Now go make those new students feel welcomed, connected, and engaged! And please, don’t stop doing that even after orientation.
