When I was in second grade, I didn’t like substitute teachers. Yes, I actually cried when my teacher was out sick. We can delve into that at our next therapy session. Anyway, there was a particular substitute teacher who I thought was scary because she seemed like a grumpy old lady. One day, as an inspired seven-year-old, I decided to face my fear of this substitute by tidying up the pile of homework papers on her desk. She thanked me for being thoughtful, and I instantly wasn’t scared of her anymore. In fact, I thought she was alright. I didn’t know it then, but I had just employed the Benjamin Franklin Effect.
What is the Benjamin Franklin Effect?
Good old Ben had a sneaky way of getting someone to like him. He had a political rival that he wanted to form a relationship with because it would prove a useful connection in the future. So, in a move that makes little intuitive sense, he wrote a letter to his rival asking to borrow a particular book from his library. Shockingly, the man said yes, and later on went to speak to Ben Franklin in person for the first time later on. They ended up becoming life-long friends.
Apparently, when someone does you a favor, their brain then looks for a reason that they did you this favor. Why, I must like them if I helped them out!, they reason. And so, in a backwards way, Ben Franklin convinced his rival into a friendship not by doing something nice, but by letting his rival do something nice for him.
What does this mean for leaders?
When you hold a position of authority on a team or in a group, it’s useful to have positive relationships with as many people as you can. Less drama and more efficient teamwork is always something you should look to foster.
Let people like you.
Not sure if a member of your community thinks you’re cool? Ask them for their help with your next event or task, or simply ask their opinion about something. When they help you out, they will feel useful, valuable, and reason that they must be on great terms with you if they did something nice.
Help people you dislike.
Just like my second grade story, there’s always a better way than harboring negative attitudes towards someone else. Force yourself to swallow your pride and do them a small favor. You’ll both feel better about your relationship, and your role as a leader to serve others will be strengthened.
Sometimes, it’s the most unexpected actions that make a person stand out as a leader who is respected by everyone. How can you apply the Benjamin Franklin Effect to your life?
