Last week was Miss New Jersey week! For most people reading that, it will mean nothing, but for me, it’s an annual family reunion…
At the age of 11, I competed in my first pageant. My sportswear outfit was magenta, my gown was teal, I tap danced to “This Joint is Jumpin’” in a red and black costume and in my interview, I was able to make the judges laugh. At the end of the night, I was named “Little Miss West Deptford 1998″ surrounded by friends who were excited about my win, even though I just competed against them. As the years progressed, I went on to represent my town and county at the teen level, then when I eligible, I started competing in the Miss America system. My mentor held the title of Miss Gloucester County and since I wanted to be just like her, that was the first local pageant I did in the Miss America Organization. Lucky me, I walked away with the crown and later that year I placed in the Top Ten at Miss New Jersey, winning the Casual Wear preliminary award. Once again, I was surrounded by people I was in competition with, but who were truly happy for me and my success.
Each year at Miss NJ, the group of girls changes, but one thing remains constant: support. We were all in the same position. We each worked hard to serve our communities through volunteering and fundraising for causes that were important to us, as well as to lead healthy lifestyles, walk and talk with poise and grace and continually educate ourselves on what was going on in current and world events. Because we all shared that common thread, we were able to let loose when we were around each other. Inside jokes began to form and girls who went to school near each other or lived near each other started to spend time together outside of titleholder responsibilities. No longer competitors, we became friends. And as the years passed, we became sisters.
The four points to the Miss America crown, Scholarship, Style, Service, Success, lay a good framework. These can also lay a good framework for community.
Scholarship: Remember, you are a student first. Are you fostering the importance of education in your group? What other areas besides what you have in common are you exploring to learn more about yourself and the world?
Style: In a world that sends mixed messages to belong and then stand out, having something in common with others adds to your personal brand. What’s your community’s style? What sets you apart?
Service: It’s not about you. The state winner represents the thousands of girls in the state doing tremendous acts of service in their respective communities. Student leaders represent their club, which represents the rest of the student body. How big is your influence? What important causes have you rallied for?
Success: When times get tough, I know I have people that I can turn to for advice, a shoulder to cry on or to make me laugh. Knowing I have this support makes me fearless, translating into being able to successfully tackle any challenge. Who sets you up for success? How do your team members support each other?
Each June, I look forward to reuniting with volunteers and current and former competitors at the Miss New Jersey pageant on the Ocean City boardwalk. Great seeing you this weekend, fam 🙂
